I've been trying to think of how to respond to everyone who has commented while I've been on sabbatical. Thank you ALL for all of your comments! I needed a minute...so I took a few, a few hundred/thousand.
Yesterday I started a class called Personal Defense for Women. I decided to take a PE course this semester, in hopes that it will keep me active and take my mind off of all the intense/heavy courses I'm taking. I'd rather take something like yoga or hiking but this is the only one that fits into my schedule. I have my reservations about self-defense courses...
I think it is impossible to predict how one might respond in a situation that forces them to defend themselves. Training people to "be prepared" for an attack places a large responsibility on that person. It is quite contradictory to preach that "if you've had a previous attack, it wasn't your fault, it was out of your control" while emphasizing that this training will help you next time. What if it doesn't help? What if you forget everything? What if you freeze? Now is it your fault? You were trained. While this comment may be a bit radical, it is reasonable to inquire.
Furthermore, I think self-defense courses create a false sense of security. The dialogue increases your confidence, which in turn can lead to a decreased sense of awareness...letting your guard down.
I feel that this training just reinforces the idea that it is up to the victim to protect themselves, rather than placing responsibility on the offender.
Not only this, it also emphasizes the focus on the stereotypical stranger rape/attack that only happens in back alleys or when walking alone. Because of this, the course is missing a HUGE portion of attacks that occur, those done by acquaintances after a period of manipulation/control. How does one prepare for these situations?
I understand that I may be a bit too critical. I am sure that the course will increase my confidence in myself, hopefully allowing me to freely reject the idiot guy in the bar who insists on grabbing my attention. We'll see. I'm keeping an openmind and will report back throughout the course of the semester.
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4 comments:
I think so too Alisha!
I took a rape defense for women course and I froze.
I have way too much to say about this topic so I'd better go for now before I sit here typing for an hour.
Feel free to come back and leave your comments about this topic at any time! I'll be reporting how it makes me feel throughout the semester...next class is on monday. I hope you're doing well Nika...I think you have my number, call me if you'd like to chat sometime!
Thanks darling!
I am very interested in hearin more about how the course goes.
I very much agree with what you have said abuot it.
"if you've had a previous attack, it wasn't your fault, it was out of your control" while emphasizing that this training will help you next time.What if it doesn't help? What if you forget everything? What if you freeze? Now is it your fault? You were trained. While this comment may be a bit radical, it is reasonable to inquire.
I think you are right, it kind of gives the impression that once yuo are trainned you are responsible for what happens.
I think this is... have no words.
The principle is that you shouldn´t be attacked. If you are attacked, the blame is on the attacker, always.
Even if you train to be able to physically defend yourself, you will still suffer from the attack. Emotional damage takes a lot longer to heal.
A frustated attack is still damaging and shouldn´t happen.
And as you very well say most attacks are perpretated by a non-stranger and there is normally so much manipulation that the victim doesn´t even try to stop it.
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